Wine + Wisdom: Risk Rejection.

Good evening, and welcome to the inaugural post of 'Wine + Wisdom',  where I will share the latest wine that I'm sippin' on and a life lesson that I've encountered over the course of the week. Questions, comments or wisdom you'd like to share? Be sure to hit me on Twitter or in the comments below. Let's pour up, shall we? 

There's so much power in taking a risk. Leaping  jubilantly into the unknown with mustard seed-sized faith, and putting yourself so far out on front street that there can't be any possible way of you finding your way back to where you started. For as long as I can remember, I've never been scared to try something new, but it's the reaction to my risk taking that usually gives me pause. Sometimes, it's positive; but the negative usually results in the form of rejection.

Reflecting on this, I'm finishing up the last bottle of four from my quarterly Bright Cellars subscription . It's a 2014 Nero D'avola Terre Siciliane by Arduini, and it is absolutely delicious. To break that down for y'all, Nero D'avola translates to "the most important red wine grape in Sicily" - specifically southeast Sicily . If you know me, you know I love my red wine and this one in particular has just the right amount of dryness and sweetness. With notes of raspberry and blackberry, this red wine is on the lighter side and doesn't linger too long on the pallet.

Now that you've gotten into my pour, back to the wisdom. Experiencing rejection is never easy, but it's a character builder that is absolutely necessary. From not getting the job of your dreams, to losing your job, to being ignored and/or completely dismissed by your significant other, the feeling of inadequacy and worthlessness can seep through at the drop of the dime.

But it's important that you don't allow the outcome of rejection to take over you. Yes, you took a step into the unknown and put your heart on the line, only to hear the word "no" and get your ego is bruised in the process. You feel all the terrible negative feels and maybe even question whether or not you deserve what your heart truly desires. Again, don't play yourself! These feelings are temporary, and believe it or not, you're a lot tougher than you could ever imagine. Most importantly, you are deserving of all the happiness, joy and peace the world has to offer.

Moral of the story? Embrace rejection because it'll make you stronger and more resilient in the end. Taking risks is apart of this thing we call life, and every thing you've ever wanted is waiting for you on the other side of fear.

Until next time, keep your head up and that wine glass full.

Cheers.

S.T.A.R.T. Before You're Ready.

November was quite the whirlwind for me both professionally and personally, but I wanted to drop a note of reflection as we into the last month of the year.  Have you ever wanted to start something new (let's in this case, say a blog) but continued to come up with excuses as to why you aren't able to launch it?

"I just don't have enough time to write a blog post every day."

"What am I going to write about? And who will want to read it?"

"I want my post to be perfect before I hit publish - I must keep editing!"  

The truth is, while we were busy asking ourselves 21 questions, making statements and assuming, we could've published at least one or two posts, created a content calendar for the next two months and put throwback content in rotation on social media.

Last month specifically, I spent most of my time getting back into the groove of working full-time and managing my various passion projects. And let me tell you, it hasn't been easy. In addition to getting ready for the new year, training for my third half marathon in January and traveling for the holidays, I haven't had much time to put my ideas into action - which has resulted in a ridiculously long line of questioning in my head.

But that long line of questioning I've taken myself through is only procrastination. And I'll be honest - my procrastinating ways and (sometimes) self-doubt have held me back from starting a lot of new things. Days and days have gone by because I thought and over-thought about the "what-ifs" instead of putting in the work, promoting what I've created and learning about myself along the way.

So how exactly do we break this cycle? Starting before we're ready. 

You're probably thinking, "Well Chasity, what does that look like exactly?"

I'm glad you asked friend. 

To me, starting before we're ready is less about being prepared and more about fearlessly taking the risk to step into your greatness. I know it's so cliche, but we truly have everything we need to launch our dreams, bring them to life and watch them flourish.

When I started Millennial On A Mission almost three years ago, I knew that I wanted to shed light on the amazing things that my peers were doing both professionally and personally because I was sick of the media calling us lazy, narcissistic, and entitled life-time members of Broke Phi Broke. It soon occurred to me that I was surrounded by a group of amazing individuals who are defying these stereotypes and needed to have their stories told.

What started off as two blog features a month has grown into an online community of millennials with different backgrounds and disciplines, but who are all passionate about discovering their life's purpose and bringing it to life.

Looking back on the conception of MOAM and any other projects that I've completed, I had to remember what it meant to actually meant to S.T.A.R.T. something from the bottom and build it up:

SEEK out a problem you wish to solve. For me, it was dispelling the myth that millennials were much about nothing and mooching off of their parents post-college. What problem do you wish to solve? Be willing to ask yourself an uncomfortable question or two.

TAILOR your voice to a specific audience. Again, I wanted to speak specifically to my millennial peers. In doing so, I had to not only share their story, but share my journey as well. Once you decide the problem you wish to solve, make sure that your content is resonating with an audience that will understand the message you are trying to convey.

ALLOW for vision to expand.  Initially, MOAM was just going to be a blog feature. But the more I spoke with my peers about their experiences, the more I realized that I needed to stretch it's purpose - one that I'm actually still trying to discover. With any goal we wish to achieve, we must be willing to give ourselves the space to grow and change. And who knows, something beautiful make come out of that detour.

REMIND yourself to be patient with the process. Listen, Linda. I can't stress this one enough! There is no such thing as overnight success. We are going to have to work hard, long hours in order to achieve what we hope to accomplish. If you need a break, take one. But even as you wait for something to happen, there's always work to be done.

TAKE time to evaluate what has worked, what hasn't and move forward accordingly. It will forever be important to conduct market research, test your product, check your work and monitor your progress. If something didn't work, that's alright! There's nothing wrong with pivoting or shifting in order to get to where we want to be. The time you take to review and evaluate your work, the more meaningful it will be to those who will benefit from it.

So there you have it! What are you planning to S.T.A.R.T as we move into a new year?

Let me know in the comments below or tweet me!

Chasity

Wisdom Wednesday: You Can Change.

"These are the times of your life, don't you know who you are?You can be anything you make up on your mind. Don't feel bad about your past, it made you who you are You can change anything, and you can start today." - 'You Can Change', Purple Wondaluv

After three months and twenty eight days, I'm happy to report that Operation #HireChasity has officially come to an end.

And while I'm grateful and excited for this new opportunity, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on this unique experience I've had these last three in a half months.

When I lost my job in July, I knew that finding another position would take some time, but it was the ultimate goal. I've never been one to not be picky or to settle easily, so I was quite choosy with which things to dedicate my time and energy to. I started to write more, connect with new and trusted mentors, and just enjoy the time that I had to test the waters of what it would be like being a creative full-time. I'll keep it 💯 – the life of an entrepreneur is far from glamorous. Yes, it may seem like you have all the time in the world and you're doing what you love and enjoy, but to be successful at this #TrepLife takes discipline, focus and patience – all traits that I know I am constantly working on improving within myself.

I've grown a hell of a lot in these last three months, and I'm so grateful for it.

And while I may have chosen to extend my talents in a new direction, this doesn't mean that I'm going to negate my personal obligation to fuel my passion in empowering my generation to be a better version of themselves.

One lesson that I will undoubtedly take with me into this next chapter is this: your family, friends, associates and even strangers will all have their own perfect vision for how you should live your life. But truthfully, their opinions must sometimes (if not all) respectfully and lovingly take a back seat. YOU are the main character in your story, so don't feel bad if you must go left when everyone else wants you to go right. You have everything you need to determine what happens next in your life, so be selfish in what you want and work hard to make it happen. Make yourself proud, and be prepared to kick some serious ass in order to make those dreams come true.

2015 has taught me to confidently go in the direction of my dreams, accept the plot twists that life throws my way and believe that the next chapter, the next opportunity, the next experience is always going to be than the last.

To those who have encouraged me, kept me lifted and prayed with and for me, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are greatly appreciated.

This next chapter is going to be amazing - I'm claiming that here and now.

Carpe Diem, Chasity

It's Not How Fast You Run, It's How You Cross The Finish Line.

Just yesterday, I ran my second half marathon in Toronto, Canada with 26,000 people from all over the world. But there was more to my weekend than just running through "The 6" with my woes. It was about connecting with over 300 runners from all over the globe who share the same passion for hitting the pavement as I do.

Bridge The Gap was established by Charlie Dark and Mike Saes in order to "connect the dots between running culture, lifestyle, music, art and creativity with events around the globe where crews come together to meet, run, create and party together." Their one idea has given birth to a global movement that continues to inspire people not only to become better athletes, but also better human beings.

During the running expo, Charlie spoke to the crowd about living in London, working in the music industry and why he decided to start Run Dem Crew. And while he shared a number of notable gems, the one thing that stuck with me was this quote:

"It's not how fast you run, it's how you cross the finish line."

Hearing that the day before the race was definitely inspiring, but the words didn't deeply resonate with me until after I crossed the finish line yesterday.

For those of you that have run long distances, you're fully aware of the fact that running sucks. Every time I lace up my sneakers to prepare for a run, I know that I'm about to push myself to the limit physically, mentally and emotionally. And sometimes, I've found that it is necessary to reach the edge in order to see what I'm truly made of.

Yesterday was definitely the hardest race I've run to date. It was COLD AF (pardon the language, but it's true) and my body was completely shocked by the elements. My focus was slightly off and I was in unfamiliar territory, but I knew that there was one goal: to cross that finish line. Despite my slow pace, frost bitten hands, wobbly ankles and aching muscles, I had to keep telling myself that I was going to cross that finish line. 

To have that extra support from my friends as well as thousands of random strangers cheering me on (even when I felt like I was at my lowest) was truly incredible. But when I crossed that finish line with my arms raised above my head, I couldn't help by burst into tears of happiness, joy and relief.

If there's one thing that yesterday's race taught me, it's that there will be times in this life when I will be uncomfortable  and down right scared out of my mind. But it is in those times when things are a little hairy and unfamiliar that I'm being pushed to shine my brightest.

I'm learning that these feelings of doubt and uncertainty are only temporary. And while I'm blessed to have the support of my family and friends cheering me on from the sidelines (and even sometimes jumping in the race to run it with me) I know that ultimately I have to pace myself, push through those moments of pain and celebrate crossing every finish line successfully.

-Chasity

Why I'm So Proud (And Grateful) To Be Orange

Last night was MAD real.  If you follow me on social media, you saw that I had returned to my beloved alma mater, Syracuse University. Since I've graduated four years ago, I've been back to campus quite a few times, but this was definitely the most special of them all.

Each year to welcome the incoming freshman class, the Division of Student Affairs puts together an awesome production called Home To The Dome. Basically, it's a pep rally to hype up the newest members of #OrangeNation and welcome them to the family. From learning the fight song and alma mater to repping their respective residence halls, the freshmen get their first taste of what it really means to have Orange Pride.

This year, a handful of Generation Orange alumni were invited back to share stories on their defining Orange moments. I was lucky enough to be a part of this special group, and share my special moment that took place in The Dome almost five years ago.

Now, I'm not sharing this experience to boast or brag - I just REALLY love my school and completely appreciated my college experience. The four years I spent at SU not only molded me into the woman that I am today, but it also brought some of the most wonderful people into my life that I'm so thankful to call family. The one piece of advice that I shared with the Class of 2019 is to be purposeful in leaving their mark on Syracuse University. For me, my mark will forever be standing on that 50 yard line among thousands of football fans and being crowned the first black homecoming queen in 16 years.

But that moment was about so much more getting the crown, learning SU history and campaigning for votes. It was about the people who had helped me get to that point, and truly understanding what it means to be apart of a community that wants you to succeed. Furthermore, it's about sewing seeds into that community, and making sure that you're always giving back and not expecting anything in return.

I can only hope that the 3000+ students that were in The Dome yesterday really take their time at SU and run like the wind with it. Andor those who have been out of school for a while like myself, find a way to support your alma mater outside of homecoming, football and basketball season. (Donating money counts too!)

To my dearest Syracuse, thank you for the awesome opportunities and countless memories you have (and continue) to give me. I'm so happy to call you home.

-Chasity